This video examines what you can do to save your marriage during separation.
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Kimberly Beam, CEO of Marriage Helper, discusses several things you can do to save your marriage if you are separated.
These include SMART Contact™, avoiding PUSH behaviors, and managing business items together.
Find the areas of your marriage and relationship where you are going to have to talk about certain things (mortgages, taxes, children, property, pets, etc.).
Reach out to your spouse about positive things related to the children or business items.
This will prevent negative interactions and promote positive ones.
Doing these things will give you momentum in attempting to save your marriage while you are separated.
Avoid fighting as best you can. Change the cycle and be the best "you" that you can be during those times.
During these discusses you may ask your spouse questions such as, "How was your day today?"
You should ask questions that are non-emotional and won't start a disagreement.
Allow your spouse to start conversations with you. Allow them to open up to you about their day or about how they feel in terms of the separation.
Whether or not you agree with what your spouse is sharing, you must be a safe place for your spouse to share.
Show them that you can hear what they have to say and that even if you disagree with it that you can respond in a way that is calm, gentle, and understanding.
Don't go overboard by sounding artificial or fake. Be sincere and sometimes it is best simply to listen without commenting.
If your spouse, during separation, is rude and antagonistic to you, it is difficult.
You need to plan ahead of time that you will avoid allowing emotion or defensiveness to take over. Focus on the long term goal of saving your marriage.
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